Backstage

Some days,
you are sitting backstage
from your life
relaxing, eating a bagel,
thinking of what to do next,
waiting for them to play the music
that's your cue
to walk on stage


-Jim DuBois
Oct 21, 2010

Faded

I.

I never thought
those times would
become faded

Or that my voice might be
the spectre of the past
calling out,
reminding you,
reminding me,
of something…

…something indistinct
but important,
locked away in memory,
in childhood,
in these faded photographs
of who we used to be
but can never be again.



II.

I never thought
those times would
become faded,
but these photographs
tell the true story,
that we weren’t who we
thought we were,
and we still aren’t,
and it’s only by a trick
of the mind
and avoidance of the sight of our old bad
hair cuts
that we convince ourselves
that nothing’s changed.



III.

Sometimes something
indistinct can tell us
more than something precise,
because what is essential
is dynamic and can’t be captured…

…we can only be reminded of it,
and experience it anew.

We have memories and feelings
about the past
but no more moments of it.



IV.

I look out the window,
watching the grey weather
quietly drop snow onto Northampton
as I write down some thoughts
that came to me
after looking at these old pictures.

I know that one day,
this moment will also fade,
this ink will disappear and
the paper crumble.

Until then
I just want to say:

We still have time
to be who we’ve
always been.



-Jim DuBois
2005?

Momentary Ambition

Sometimes there's no guide
    Sometimes there's no right or wrong,
        only a momentary ambition
            to climb into your eyes

Sometimes there's nothing to understand
    Sometimes there's no rules,
        only love
            you didn't expect


-Jim DuBois
Dec 8, 1998

The Places I Think You Might Have Been

Walking by the places
I think you might have been.

Scratch off tickets
litter the sidewalk
that leads to the house
a friend of yours
might
have lived in.


Walking by the places
I saw you last.

Eight years ago
I met you briefly
behind the counter
at the Pleasant Street Theater.

Once at Bread and Circus
we talked for a moment,
but I can't remember
what we said.

Six months ago
we waved and said hello
in the parking lot
behind Thornes
I smiled and blushed
and fell in love.


Walking by you,
a few weeks ago
on main street,
I felt my stomach clenching
and I ducked behind a tree
even though I wanted
to be brave.



-Jim DuBois
June 27, 2005

"steel candy-cake perfume"

I remember that time
that you said
"steel candy-cake perfume"
and
Karl Marx
rose from the dead,
not came back to life,
just rose
straight up
UP
UP
into the air
and disapearred,
heading out
towards the
Oort cloud
and the horsehead
nebula

Well, that's the last time
I'll sing butterflies
of
supercluster cadences



-Jim DuBois
June 19, 2006